How to Move On After Hardship
Dr. Allana Da Graca
Moving Past Pain
Thousands of Americans have had moments of dissatisfaction that stems from an inability to let go of a hurtful event. Many of the women who follow my Tomorrow Can’t Wait Facebook page have acknowledged a variety of reasons for their discontentment. A woman who wrote me said, “I know that I should move on and the relationship is over but this was the man I was supposed to marry.” We know that heartache can stem from a broken relationship, job loss or betrayal from a trusted friend. It can also be daunting to enter into a new phase of life where one feels completely isolated. When we hit this fork in our lives we still have a CHOICE to leave a pit of indecision for something more. Here are some quick TIPS for finding ways to move on in your life.
Action Assignment: Self- Talk Recording
In my communication courses with students I would encourage them to use a voice recorder to archive their reactions, feedback and comments about a particular assignment. They would look at me as I would ask them to complete this awkward task as if to say, “This makes no sense.” With that said, they would bring in their recorders and listen to their perspectives unfold one at a time. By the end of a six week period they would reflect on their audio narrations and recognize a thread of thought about a given concern.
Personal development can be enhanced in the same way. You will need your phone or computer webcam to take part in this assignment. Simply pick one area in your life that you would like to enhance and decide to bluntly state your thoughts about this challenging area of your life in a private room. Pretend your recorder is the most trusted friend you have. Try to speak into your device for a 3-5 minute period in order to make sure all of your concerns are addressed. Here are some questions you can answer and record into your device.
- What is the one area in your life that is the hardest area to move on from?
- Who do you blame for this area of discontentment in your life?
- What would you be doing right now if this were not such a hard spot in your life?
*Record your responses in a journal or audio file so that you can return to this later. Join us for part two of this move on series to gain tools to make changes in this one area of your life as early as tomorrow. Don’t continue to put off the very things you would like to do today. Let’s move on together!
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Dr. Allana Da Graca is the founder of Turning on the Lights Global Institute, Inc. Her focus as an educator is to help adult learners reach their personal and professional goals. She is the author of a new self-help book called, Tomorrow Can’t Wait. Currently she teaches a variety of communication courses as an online instructor at Walden University. She is the recipient of the Robert C. Ford Fellowship, University of Massachusetts Amherst Community Leadership Award and Bunker Hill Community College Martin Luther King Leadership Award.
Learn more at: drallanadagraca.com